When God Makes You Wait: Finding Purpose, Peace, and Emotional Strength When Life Feels Stuck —

Hello there, fearfully and wonderfully made human. It's me, Diana Rice from Through the Valley Therapy and Transform Mind Consulting and Coaching. Have you ever been in a season when you're praying, waiting, hoping, and nothing seems to move? A season when you're taking you're when you're asking God for clarity, for answers, for direction, and instead you're met with silence, delays, or closed doors.

Maybe you're waiting for healing, waiting for breakthrough, waiting for reconciliation, waiting for purpose, waiting for the next step, waiting for something to finally make sense. For so many of us, waiting can feel like the hardest place to be emotionally, spiritually, and even mentally.

It can stir frustration, comparison, doubt, impatience, anxiety, and that quiet question we don't always say out loud. Lord, what are you doing? And how long do I have to wait? Today, we're exploring that space, the tension between what you pray for and what you actually see in front of you.

The place where your faith gets stretched, your identity gets refined, and your emotional resilience gets tested. And joining me for this conversation is someone whose life, work, and story intersect beautifully with these themes. Dr. Yol Pierre is a licensed marriage and family therapist, a missionary to Haiti, an author of faith-based books, and a leader who integrates psychology, scripture, and spiritual formation in powerful and culturally grounded ways.

Her book, While I'm Waiting: Eight Actions to Take During Your Season of Waiting, speaks to what so many of us wrestle with: patience, purpose, emotional growth, trusting God's timing, and navigating the unknown. So, if you're in a season where things feel slow, uncertain, or not going the way you expected, you're in the right place.

And this is a moment to simply breathe, settle in, and feel seen.

Thank you, Yol, for being on the show.

Thank you, Diana, for having me. What a privilege.

Well, so let's just start and explore, you know, before we even explore your book, I love for listeners to hear the heartbeat behind it. When you look back over your life, Haiti, motherhood, heartbreak, ministry, health challenges, what's the story of how you became the woman who could write a book on waiting with this much depth, honesty, and authority?

You know, just being a willing vessel because even up until I want to say the week of submitting into Amazon, uploading it, I'm like, Lord, am I really doing this? this isn't this is an open journal. Um, and so I believe that I'm just a willing vessel, someone that God wanted me to share my story with.

When I look over my life, I see God was quietly molding me in the shadows when I felt forgotten, when I felt unseen, right? When I felt as if, you know, can I truly be happy? like I see other people with this joy and this peace.

Can I truly experience it? But it wasn't until co when um I was journaling, processing, trying to make sense of my life. And I think we'll get into it later on in um this podcast, but when I was just trying to figure out life, um people would look at me and they would say, "Wow, how do you deal with that?"

Because during co I was pregnant, right? And you know how that was shut down.

Oh yeah.

Um and at that time I was separated from my husband not by choice but because the borders were closed.

And um I remember just feeling alone but yet my friends will make comments about the way that I was waiting to be reunited with him. And two years later I found myself in another season of waiting. And mind you, prior to that, I've been waiting.

I feel like I've been waiting all my life. And that's why I would constantly ask God, why am I constantly in this season of waiting? Waiting for peace, waiting for joy, waiting for intimacy, right? Waiting for a breakthrough.

Um, and it wasn't until two years later, two two years after COVID, when one of my friends was saying, "Y'all, I don't know how you do it." And I was like, "What? do what? And I realized that people were watching my posture, watching my language, listening to how I speak about my struggles.

I wasn't even aware, you know. Um, but they realized that I was truly waiting on God to do something and I had stopped fighting it. And that's when I realized, wow, um, I need to start recording everything because some of the things that they're saying to me, I'm not seeing it,

right? But I can see how it would bless someone and it encouraged me.

And so I'm a person, um, who journals a lot.

And so, um, I just started writing about all the different experiences from then. And that's when God allowed me and pushed me, like I said, two weeks or a few even a few days um, up until I submitted the transcription. He, you know, he really revealed to me people need to hear um the way the posture in which to wait.

Not that I've done it right, Diana, but I hear you.

I've seen God through.

It's obedience.

It's obedience. It's when when you state you are a disciple of Jesus Christ. The main thing is obedience to what the calling is on the on your life. I want to go back a little though when you said that that you were separated from your husband.

This was in 2020. I'm taking it. And And what's funny, well, it's not funny, but what what I see is that many of us

I I wrote two poetry books during that whole season. That's how I was able to handle what I was seeing and experiencing and everything. Journaling, I journal, but I'm more of like I don't know, spoken word kind of like stuff comes to me and I'm just like, you know, and art and creativity, digital art.

And that's how I had a process and and and stuff like that. But I want to know where was your husband? What do you mean borders? Like I'm like what are you talking about?

So uh so we're missionaries in Haiti, right? And so when um when COVID hit, actually we didn't even know what was happening. But March 15th, I came to the States for a doctor's visit because in Haiti the, you know, the medical system is not that great.

So being pregnant, I wanted to make sure that I had quality um medical care and so I came for doctor's visits and that's when rumors were going around that I remember you know co is is going around and but we weren't really aware of what was happening in Haiti

and so I came March 15th and I believe March 17th that's

it was everything. Yeah. they closed the borders and I'm like, "Oh my gosh,

oh my gosh,

when am I going to go back or you know and at that time he couldn't come

and of course you know the doctors told me that I was high risk because they they didn't know what was happening. So imagine waiting for so long to find love and waiting to have a child and finally you have this child thinking my husband would be rubbing my stomach every day talking to you know baby Grace and just loving on me and here I am alone in this pink room cuz I went back to my parents house and I just felt lost.

Oh no. Like I'm that sorry guys.

The reason why I'm moved to tears because let me tell you that global pandemic was a global PTSD for all of us. Mo many of us. I shouldn't talk for everybody but I know for me and so when you're I'm picturing everything. This is the high empathy

our field.

Oh no that was me. That was me. What your experiences that was me every day. It's like is it is it hormones? Is it pregnancy? What is it? Is it the separation? Is it lonely?

No, but can you I'm just imagining I'm married. I have children. I can just imagine. You're like living your life. You're doing your thing and then boom, this happens. This this I mean it was the most one of the and people like some people are still have effect side effects from that pandemic.

I mean I see it in the youth. I see it in young people and so in um you know the the realization of what that did to so many people that we're still seeing the after effect of that shutdown.

Okay. So I'm just picturing myself in your shoes being pregnant

being married to someone you adore and then boom this is happening and you and at that time we had no idea will we ever see each other? Are they going to die? Can you tell me how long it was from that to the to before you were able to just hold your husband again?

It was so March through December. So what is that? 6 months.

Oh my gosh.

So going through the entire pregnancy.

Wow.

And or the tail end of my pregnancy and um actually delivering my baby without him. Um, by the grace of God, the doctors, you know, they understood what I was going through and so they allow him to watch the process. Um, but it was it was 6 months.

Yeah.

Wow.

Okay. So, yeah. So, so like this book really, I'm telling you, I read parts of it um and I'm just like, oh, okay. This is a memoir and therapeutic. It's like both. You know, you're telling your

my open journal.

Yeah. It's your vulnerability.

Yeah.

As a therapist, that is amazing. Of a of true stories and how you got through it because that's what that's the situation you said that

you felt alone, right? So many humans do feel alone, especially now. They think they're the only ones going through, you know, whatever it is they're going through. So I want to understand more about the the word weight. I can't even pronounce that word.

Quava. How do you say it?

Kava.

Cava.

Yeah.

Okay. Not k a v a the drink. It's

it's q a v a h. Why that word? What what is that meaning? And why did you really focus on that? So during my seasons of waiting, one of the things that kept me is reading scriptures, like just reading and meditating. Sometimes I didn't believe them, sometimes I did

u and just listening to different preachers. And so that word came up and I was like, "Oo." And I heard a preachers um preach on it. So I did a lot of research just to understand it. And so the meaning is basically to to wait, but it's deeper than just waiting.

You know, when you're waiting um for the operator to answer the call or waiting, you know, for um a text message. No, it's it's much deeper. So, it's really abiding. It's to wait with anticipation.

And so, that really helped me because that was my life. I no longer wanted to just wait just blindfully like Lord I'm waiting but I don't know what I'm waiting for because I don't know if you are going to answer me but I wanted to wait knowing that he is a good a good father

you know just like with my daughter and my son when I leave to go you know out of the country or leave to go on anything they're always waiting for me to come back but they're waiting for me to come back with something

right waiting for me to come back with a hug with a little small gift with so it's waiting with anticipation and so um that word I hold on to it because that's what I had to do to breathe there's times when I was waiting I couldn't even breathe Diana

when I mean like just dying on the inside and that's how I can relate to my clients because I get it when when they tell me they're so anxious to where they're having a panic attack but when you're waiting with anticipation it's different

because you know on the other side of it God is right there ready for for you know ready to give you that tight hug that safe hug.

Yeah. I mean I I like it because it is um what you said abiding abiding in him because sometimes in the waiting like when you just said like the panic attacks when I have clients like that or I've had my own it is you start training the brain to wire that way.

So you're anticipating it coming and then all of a sudden you're more anxious because you're waiting for that. How? But what you're talking about is shifting it to surrender it to God.

Yeah. So the anticipation is no longer I'm going to break down, there's going to be a panic attack, but the anticipation is this, you know, I know who's going to hold me if I do end up having a panic attack.

Yeah.

Right. So, I know if I fall back, I know who's going to catch me.

And so, one of my um favorite scriptures is John 15:5. It's it's a very common um or well-known scripture where it says, "Abide in me and you will bear much fruit." And so during um my one of my seasons of awaiting because there's so many while my son was going through his um medical issues, God took me back to like the crafting of plants.

I don't know if you're familiar with that process. And so in Haiti, they do a lot of crafting. And so basically, if you have two different types of plants and you want it to bind up like

Oh, okay. Let's say um

a mango tree.

A mango treat. Yes.

Oh, girl.

They're so good. Oh my gosh. I talk about that in both of my books cuz I love mango.

Yeah.

But you won't know which one you're tasting,

right? So that's the type of abinding where you're so connected,

you know, you're so abided or if that's a word, but you're so connected and crafted

in God, his scriptures, his words, his truth

to where your thoughts and his thoughts are merged and you can't tell the difference.

Wow.

And so that's the experience that I was begging God for because I had defeated thoughts, you know, suicidal thoughts. Um, and I was like, Lord, I want to believe your scriptures. I want to experience it. So, help me. And he took me to John 15, um, five.

You have to abide in me.

Yes.

To connect with me. Not just for a moment and, you know, disconnect. You got to stay

um connected.

I it listen that I that right there I started studying um Isaiah, Ezekiel, and Revelation. So, my first book was the poetry and artwork that came out of me being in the word during the, you know, 2020 and 2021. And the stuff that came out of me, my husband's like, "Are you are you taking drugs?"

I'm like, "No, this is just what's coming out because I'm in the word day and night because I would get up, be in the word, and I'm like, Lord, I have no idea what's happening." if I watched the media or listened to my I was working at alternative high schools so the teenagers were you know everybody and I was the only therapist amongst the staff and so

it was like you know Miss Rice what do you think what's going on and then getting online and trying to have being the one that's supposed to be calm while I'm going Lord what's going on oh my god you know praying without ceasing makes a lot of sense

right that verse

and that's what the waiting season does when We allow God to do it. He allows you to see scripture come alive.

It's one thing, you know, all these scriptures like one of them is Proverbs 3:5 and6. Trust in the Lord with all your heart. Lean not unto your own understanding. That's my favorite scripture. But I didn't really know what that meant. It just sounded good, right?

You know, when I was first introduced to it, but during these different seasons of waiting,

it made sense. I couldn't trust in my own intellect.

That's it. I couldn't rationalize my way out of things,

right?

I had to feel it. I had to release it. I had to believe, you know, what I was reading.

Yeah.

Yeah. It is. It is because this is what happens to so many of us. I I work with a lot of clients that are disentangling their faith from their trauma, which means they might have grown up in church or might have been homeschooled or had a a high um controlling religion that they were surrounded it by, you know, and it was so much guilt and shame and legalism and then they they're like, "Forget this.

I want nothing to do with God." And so sometimes they come to me and then I also have I'm like Lord you bring people that are brand new in the faith and that to me I'm like oh like because you know you do not want to guide anybody in a terrible way

and they hold on to your words like new believers they hold on to those words so you have to be careful

right and so the focus is always on the word.

Yeah.

Isn't that the sword of the spirit?

Yes.

Okay. and that that you know and some people don't understand the Christianes because I have listeners that are not Christians and so it's like trying to get them to understand that the faith that's what faith is like you have choices faith or fear and I kept going like no I'm going to walk in faith not by sight I'm going to

you know and so with you you wrote two books you said so the one I have is the second book what was your first one about

the First one is divine thoughts. Seeking peace in a chaotic world. Yeah,

we so need that, right? Like,

yeah, that was open. That was another open journal because that one was actually me sending text messages and emails to my friends and uh one of them was like, "You need to write a book." I'm like, "Me? I'm not a writer." You know, I just like sending things to you guys.

You You know what, Diana? I I used to say this a lot. Um it's like being in the desert and just being dehydrated. When you finally find water,

water meaning truth or something to help you feel steady and at peace and grounded, you want to share it.

And so that's what these books are about. Not because I have the answers or, you know, cuz I I really don't. But I go back. I'm looking at my book right now. I go back to divine thoughts because of how my brain and my experiences, my traumas.

I have defeated thoughts where I have to always, you know, bring them back to God. I know we shouldn't pick them back up, but they keep showing up.

It's part of life. It's part of life.

And that's what we're trying we have to understand as humans that you know I think we've come to such a place right now in society where we've been lied to so much for the last 15 20 years especially through social media the comparison the now that the AI you know nobody understands what is true anymore and then especially after co now you know things are coming out left and right of like well they said follow the

science follow this follow that and people followed and then they they feel like distraught or lied to or you know just what happened with the young people the gener you know Gen Z and and they're trying to find authenticity.

Yeah.

Now you don't know what's real and what's not. And I want to go back to something because you say authenticity. I promise you, Diana, I was, you know, fixing my hair. So, I have sister locks, right? And um years ago, I used to wear a lot of weave, you know.

I I don't know. The listeners know people know what we

some people are going to know. I will I know um and but we also teach here. So, you know,

I used to wear a lot of weave, right? it. Um, I was dealing with a lot of things and I wasn't comfortable with my hair and I know this is not a hair conversation but

no this is a conversation for everything

for everything and so um today so I usually braid it so I could get a little curls you know little curl going on

um and so as I was unraveling my my braids so this is real this is my hair right

okay

and so as I was on on un braiding so I could get the the curl pattern that I wanted. I started thinking about cava, believe it or not. You know, my brain always takes me to different things like all the time. I started thinking about abiding.

I started thinking about and it took me back to when I used to wear extensions. Even if you braid it, it could still come out.

It could still come a loose, right? Because it's not real. The word authenticity is what's taking me to to that thought by the way when you said authenticity

and so I started thinking oh you know there's some people who do locks like they have locks

but they use extensions to lock it and after a while the extension the hair sticks to the extension and it becomes one

right

and so when we are connected to God even if we're not God obviously But there's a certain way when we're so linked when we abide in him we be it becomes one with us just like your hair with an extension locking it right

it becomes your own but if you just put an extension like that a loose is not going to stick

so what we're seeing now is that we're not really abiding so you're not seeing the authenticity in people you don't know what's right now we don't know what's real what's fake you don't know if someone's hair is real. I mean, we're again, we're not trying to get it's not about hair, but you don't know if the you don't know if anything is real nowadays.

Right.

Right.

Yeah.

But it's okay in the sense when you yourself, you don't feel real, you don't feel authentic. The minute you stick with God, you abide in God, he will make you real. He will make you whole. He will make you authentic. Yes. Right. And you don't have to hide.

You don't have to pretend.

No, because

I don't know where that came from, but I just it just that word.

No, it's it's a it's an perfect example of of what is important and understanding and it's two therapists like we see so many people in pain.

We see so many people looking for truth and wanting to be authentic and the world has told them no or they believe the the you know everything else it's you know um the outer locus of control that's a you know psychology speak but you know that you you want to you want to this is something that I've had to have a conversation with some of my Christian clients who feel guilt and shame because they were raised where if they even think of themselves that that's selfish

and that is uh not godly and prideful and that is like I I'm literally working with some of my clients that that is and I'm like well where's that in the Bible about that

you know are you it's the intention of your heart that's why that's why I say these verses every episode I always begin with you're fearfully and wonderfully made not because

I for you to be manifesting and thinking you're all that but it's to get you to understand you were created on purpose with gifts, with talents, and even through your traumas, even through these

through

the dark, right?

That that I just heard this today. Honestly, you you hurt, you heal, then you help.

That's true,

right?

I like that.

If you choose to to surrender, and that's what you talk about in your book. It's that surrendering to the waiting to the So, I want to talk a little bit about that forced positivity, pretending everything is fine when it's not.

Why do so many Christians, do you think, struggle with honest emotions? And what does real spiritual resilience look like in seasons that feel unfair or painful? Because that's something I see is um you know spiritual bypassing or you're not praying enough or you're your faith must not be strong enough in Jesus or you know how do you deal with that in in your walk?

Yeah. Well, force positivity. Posit what is it? Positivity. That was me. You know, especially being Haitian in in the Christian world, we have a saying where if someone asks you, how are you? It's like, oh, I'm great by the grace of God. You have to answer that way.

You know, I'm great by the grace of God. Yes, we are by the grace of God. We are, but how are you really feeling? Right? And so for me, I can't answer for every believer, but for me, the reason why I did it is because of shame.

Shame from other people, you know, they'll make comments like, "Girl, you better pray about that, girl. Don't you know God is good all the time?"

I do.

Wait, and all the time, God is good.

God, oh yeah, we got to finish that part.

Yeah. And and for me, the force positivity came because of responses of um you know, making me feel as if I wasn't believing enough. I wasn't praying enough. I wasn't trusting God enough.

Yeah.

You know, and so I started just, you know, using that language just so people could leave me alone. To be honest with you, it didn't feel good. You're already feeling down. You're waiting for something great to happen sometimes. You're waiting for healing. It's hard.

And here this long-meaning Christian come and make you feel like crap, make you feel as if you're not doing these things. And so it's a mask, right? And um I again, I don't know why other people do it, but that's why I did it.

And I've noticed that's why a lot of, you know, people in my circle did it. Um, and also I think we have this idea that if you're not positive, right, quote unquote positive,

um, you're you're not you're not a Christian or you're not believing God.

You're not strong.

Yeah.

Right.

Oh, well, especially in our cultures.

Especially Yeah.

Because it is. And I'm going to talk now about like immigrant culture, which I love. I mean, my mom's an immigrant. I get it. I get it because that that resiliency and even in, you know, back in the 18 or 1700s and stuff like that with slavery and stuff, I mean, that resilience, the the the music that got came out of like that, you know, I I just think Wade in the Water for some reason.

But but but that the fierce resilience of humans, I love that about our ancestors.

Okay. I do. I love that.

Survival. It was survival.

Survival. I think we're in a place now where we're understanding yes, we need resilience, but we also need communication.

Yeah.

We also need to understand we do not want to keep passing along these things that are hurting the next generation.

And so and and especially like it's different denominations having a Christian um a Christian private practice. I realized in the last five and a half years that people come to me from all walks of denomination and I'm noticing different things of the denominations themselves.

Right? Because you have the real super logical ones that there's no feelings at all. There is no tongues, there's nothing. It is logic, logic, logic. And you know like you you have to learn to fight the you know how to debate or whatever, right?

And I'm like okay. But then some of them come in with a like, you know what, I don't even believe in this stuff anymore because you become so logical. And then we have some that come from a the opposite, hyper charismatic, whatever. It's all about the all the feels.

All about it. Satan did this, Satan did that, that's Satan, that's Satan. Then the lights just flickered. That's Satan. And I'm like,

okay. And to me as a as a Christian therapist, my job is not to put Christianity on them because Jesus is Jesus going God's going to do whatever he wants no matter what.

He's in control. Yes.

Of everything. Okay. I feel that I'm just a vessel, a mirror with tools that I was allowed to to receive

in order to help that human to really understand their place with God and who Jesus is for them.

Yeah. and and and understand that he is the way, the truth, and the life. And that right there to give them back their, you know, to listen to the Holy Spirit inside of them

if they are believers

because some people don't get it. They're still, you know, and then when something happens with a human being at their church that's a leader,

you know, because some shocked,

they're shocked. They give up. They want nothing to do with the church or Christianity. All those flipping hypocrites, hypocrites, hypocrites. I don't know how many I think I I hear the word Christians are hypocrites probably like three or four times a day.

Oh wow.

Yeah. And and I don't I'm so used to it now. And I was I was that person. I didn't become a Christian till I was 29 years old. So you know I get it. I was that person too calling like oh my god.

But then I realized right that the word of God like we were talking about

is living and active. And you know I when when we say force positivity

I think like you were saying for people are shocked or people are upset when the leader um falls

because it wasn't you know the walk they were looking more at what the leaders are saying what people are you know like it wasn't for them

and so the force positivity is like I hear you say this and usually you hear when they say oh my pastor says it's never the word of God says, it's like, oh, you know, pastor so and so said, and they're repeating what the pastor so and so says.

So, they've learned

to to do what the church or what leaders or what people are telling them as opposed to learning what the truth is,

right? Because

in context

in context in the word um we see over and over and over how leaders and spiritual um leaders including Jesus we see him

show emotions right

you can be positive and that's why even with the word positive I like to use um what's productive

you know and so based on um Philippians 4:8 you know the the scripture that says whatever is true whatever whatever is admirable. Think on these things, right?

So, we need to think on things that are productive because something could be positive. You could speak I've been speaking as Lloyd. I've been speaking some things, but it doesn't mean that it's it's going to come to pass. Right.

Right. But if you speak things that are truth and that are productive,

then that's what heals you.

Yeah. Well, that's a rewiring rewiring of the brain.

Rewiring. Yeah.

Yes. That's the That's the renewing of the mind. That's taking every thought captive to Christ. That's CBT, a cognitive behavioral therapy, right? When people are like I'm like, "Well, where'd you get that information from?"

And it stops them and they're like, "Uh."

And I'm like, "No, no." Like, honestly, where where is that narrative coming from? I'm actually studying the book of John, just the first chapter. Like, every day I've been reading John 1:1, and I'm trying to memorize it in my brain.

Like honestly I'll like once I'm done here I move on and and then you know months later I'll listen and I'm like oh yeah I remember that now but you know like the it's you know the word was God and the word is God and and I'm like logos and I'm like lo and I'm like studying I'm doing the deep dive

and it makes sense like our words

our most powerful things

and what I ask people that come into my office and I say, "How are you using the word for you? Are you using it against yourself?" You know, you're trying to please everybody else

and you're trying to, you know, but what do you what are the words that you're saying about you,

you know? So that to me, that's why writing your memoir and writing a book is so important. Anybody can do it. Honestly, anybody can do it because everyone has a story.

Yeah. Yeah.

And your story ma matters. Your story matters. My story matters. The person listening, their story matters,

you know. So, I want to talk a little bit more on your book. Well, first of all, I want to talk about the difference between hearing God and truly listening.

Oo.

Yeah. In this world full of noise and fear and comparison and spiritual confusion,

what helps someone tune out the lies and tune into truth with clarity and confidence?

Yeah. Um, you know that word hearing and listening, I just love the difference because it really helps you to see where you're at. You can hear someone, but you don't have to listen to them, right? We can Oh, someone listening now. you or hearing.

Is it hearing or is it listening? Hearing is is is not active. You're just hearing something. But when you listen, it's more active. You got to do something about it.

And so when um the difference that I talked about uh or as I guess as you shared, how can we tune out the noises? How can we tune out the lies? There's a lot of lies and you won't know their lies because the enemy is so when I say the enemy, the devil, right?

He's so crafty. He's not going to come out and just tell you something you know is a lie. Like he's he's not going to make it so obvious to you,

right?

But when you if you're not truly hearing the word or spending time with God abiding right in him, you're not going to be able to discern. You're not going to be able to detect what's true from what's lie. So what I would say is that um we have to basically be honest with ourselves.

Do we truly want to hear from God?

And yeah, a lot of us will automatically say, "Yes, of course we want to hear from God. That's why I'm listening to podcast. That's why I'm watching all these YouTube videos." But once you hear, what do you do?

Right?

What do you do with what he's telling you? And sometimes, you know, we're in the word, we're reading, we're we're doing what we need to do, but by the time we're done, we're off. We're rushing off to the next thing and we don't sit long enough for him to speak to us and that's when the listening comes.

It's like that child. It's like, "I'm talking to you. Do you hear me?" You know, the mother would be like, "Do you hear me?" Or the father. Right.

Right.

Uh yeah, mom, I hear you. I hear you.

And they go off and do something else.

Right.

Why? Because they weren't really listening. They weren't really taking what was said and applying it and putting into action. Right?

And so what I encourage everyone to do is to be honest with yourself. Do you want to know what God is asking you to do? Especially during your waiting season,

right?

Do you truly want to hear from him? And once you hear from him, are you willing to do what he's asking you to do?

It is to me it's are you willing to sit still, be still like Mary at the foot of the feet of Jesus

and actually listen? Because this is where conviction comes in. This is something I I try to have a conversation to those that want the Christian part of the counseling.

And I'm like, shame and guilt. Shame and guilt. That comes from the world. The world, not from the word. Conviction comes from the Lord. And the only way you're able to do that is if you're abiding in the word in prayer and sitting that because then you're going to really it's not like a wrath thing that you know because I grew up I grew up where I thought I was getting smited so I was going to hell anyway.

So, oh, I'm going to I'm just going to have a lot of fun. Well, and thank goodness that I changed my mind of what fun is. Fun to me now is

because you can still have fun, but

yes, I have a lot of fun and I don't ever wake up with a hangover. So, you see it it is it is realizing that, you know, that guilt and that shame from religiosity.

Okay? I mean, there's so many that have like scrupulosity and stuff like that because it's like that black and white thinking and it's like and that anxiety and stuff, but understanding the word of God like his, you know, Jesus talks about it like his burden's light.

Yeah.

Right.

And and he talks about like, you know, he's the prince of peace.

He's a good father. He wants the best. You know what verse first came to mind as you were saying that?

Um the one that says,

you know, if your father won't give you stone for bread, like if you're asking for bread, you know the scripture I'm I'm referring to, or snake for fish or something like that. So how much more will our heavenly father, if a earthly father is willing, some of them, not all of them, right?

No. Right. If your earthly parents are willing to give you the best, some of them,

how much more will your heavenly father? That's where I was like, man, I want to hear from you because you know best.

Yes.

You know best. So the minute that we truly have that in our hearts and know without a shadow of doubt that your father wants to speak to you, he wants to speak to you and he has great things to reveal to you. Yeah,

you're going to want to listen,

right? No. And you want to listen in a soberminded way out of psychosis because sometime because I work with so because of what we do. We have to be careful with that because you're like, "Oh, you hear you hear voices and stuff." So, we have to understand that we're talking about someone that, you know, you might have the anxiety or or depression because those are symptoms.

Those are symptoms. Even though we get diagnosed with those things, remember we're, you know, we we have choices to manage symptoms or to get to root causes. And sometimes that conviction, I know I was convicted like I got punched in the stomach at one time.

I'm not saying God punched me in the stomach, but it's that conviction. And I know it wasn't the guilt and shame of my past childhood traumas, my CPTTSD. It was me in the word and God really convicted me where I had to surrender and be like, I am so sorry.

Yeah. I am so sorry. And

conviction brings freedom.

Yes. Amen.

Shame will try to choke you. Shame will try to make you feel like you're worthy. You're lonely. You're forgotten. You're all these things. But conviction will give you truth, but it'll feel safe. It'll feel right. That's when you know it's conviction. You may not like

what you know the the truth,

but if you really sit with it and you trust it and you allow God to do what it needs to do with you,

there's a a a light, you know, there's freedom in it.

Freedom. That's it.

Yeah,

that's the that's the word. It's freedom. It's peace. It is I don't even know. It is so h it it it's lifech changing

when when you go from your pride because pride comes before the fall

okay when you go from pride to humility

and then you're you know what I mean and that's when you realize like how Lord you know you become in awe.

Oh I love that humility. Yeah,

because you we you know we as Christians we don't realize how prideful we are because we're thinking pride is when you're like boasting out loud and no it's thinking you know better than God.

Oh yes

it's it's trying to be God right trying to take his role that's prideful.

Yes. Yeah. And you know,

oh no, and we could just start with, you know, understanding too because what I've seen, there was this book I read uh I would say a year ago and it was called the gift of being yourself

and it talked about um pride disguised as service.

Wow. Oh,

and I when I read that chapter, that's something, you know, because sometimes you you use that God is sovereign, so he could use anything he wants cuz he's created everything. All good things come from him, right? And so when I read that, I was just like, "Oh my gosh."

And I had to sit there with that surrendering like, "Is that what I do sometimes? I'm so sorry, Lord. I don't ever want to do that again." This is why to me prayer is so important because before

reacting in emotion is something I grew up doing. I I grew up in a system that reacted in emotion,

right? We still are in a system that reacts in emotion. I mean this I've never been on Twitter because of that.

I'm serious.

Is is that still an

or Twitter X, whatever that's called, right? But you know what I mean? Like I hear that that's an angry place to be and and I've seen it. I've seen it in social media, especially working with teenagers where they come in and I mean the cyber bullying and everything like that.

So, it's like really understanding what abiding is and listening and

and just being still

being in the waiting because waiting, nobody wants to. We live in a fast-paced country. We and I love America. I'm an American. I love America. Okay. because I always have to make sure I

But I uh we live in such a fastpaced let's believe the propaganda too much and feel like okay I had no idea we're on iPhone 17 right now. Right. I had no idea until some I saw a commercial. I I walked by my husband's watching football and it was an iPhone 17.

I'm like, "Oh my gosh, we're on 17." And he goes, "Yeah, D." And I'm And then I'm looking. I'm like, "I wonder which one I have." Because I forgot. I'm back in 14. I'm like, you know, but see what what happens. It makes you feel a certain way.

Not I could care less. I wish I didn't have all these electronics around me and I could just be in the middle of the forest hugging trees

or crafting trees.

Crafting trees.

But

or grafting trees.

Crafting. Yes. Yes. And making the sweetest mangoes out there. Oh.

Uh, but but that's what I'm saying. It's that ability to train your brain to be still

in the moment. And it's uncomfortable. People don't want to do it.

People don't want to do it. So for listeners who feel stuck, forgotten, heartworing, what is one compassionate, doable step that they can take to move toward hope, emotional clarity, or renewed faith? I know it sounds this might sound simple, but as you're listening, I want you to just hug yourself.

Even now, take the time to hug yourself. You know, there's a lot of research going around how we should get at least like four hugs and if you really want, you know, to feel good, eight hugs a day. You know, a lot of times when we're waiting, we don't even get one hug a day.

Yeah.

And I want you to know that you can give yourself a hug. And for some people, they hate repeating different things, right? But I want you to think of something that you would tell your best friend or a child whenever they're going through a hard time.

And I want you to tell yourself that. What I realize is that a lot of times when we're struggling or when we're going through the storm, our brain goes like blank and we don't even know what to tell ourselves. We're not kind. We're not gentle.

Right? And so right now as you're listening to to us, I want you to identify a phrase like, you know, I am beautifully and wonderfully made.

My season of waiting doesn't define who I am. That's right.

Right. I am loved. I deserve love.

My father is good. My heavenly father wants the best for me. So identify your own truth. Right? When I say your own truth based on the word of God, right? And meditate on that. That's a practical thing that you can do. Because what happens is that we believe the lies.

A lot of different thoughts come. We believe it. So if we can believe the defeated thoughts, why not find productive thoughts

and replace it with with that?

Yes. I love how you said

the brain will believe it. Yeah. The brain will believe it the more you say it. It's like listening to music over and over. Eventually you're you're memorizing lyrics that you don't want to memorize.

So memorize new lyrics of peace,

of joy,

and hugging. Um, another thing I would say, something practical is is identify at least one person you can be completely transparent with. Um, and I know it's scary at first cuz it's like there's no way I can share those thoughts. While I'm waiting, I have really bad thoughts, right?

They're really bad. Identify at least one person you feel safe with. Now,

go to therapy or go to a therapist because that's a thing. There's so much stigma that people think going to therapy is only for I know in my in my culture it's like loca I'm not crazy.

Yeah. And I'm like

and I'm like no it's not

it's psycho educational training. That's what I tell especially my super logical humans that are like

feelings emotions. I'm like no it's

yeah it's psychological training. It is it is helping you to become just a better human. We're born not knowing anything until we learn things and sometimes what happens we learn a lot of things that are not helpful

that are not productive.

Not productive. Exactly. And so you're right on. I love that. I love it. So tell me where can someone find your book and your work and do you take clients and insurance? I mean tell me all about how if if somebody can work with you.

Right now, I am not taking clients. My I open and close because I do mission work in Haiti, so I'm in and out of the country

and right now my schedule is full.

Okay.

Um but if someone wants me as a speaker, um I do have a website which I'm not sure if you'll link it somewhere.

Yes. In the show notes

in the web world. Yeah. Um, if someone wants me to do anything like this podcast, I'm available as long as I'm in the country because when I'm in Haiti, the internet's not that strong. Not that strong.

As for my book, you can find it on Amazon and you just type in While I'm waiting, eight actions to take during your season of waiting. And it's a beautiful forest green cover

right here.

Yeah. Um, and also you can find it on my website. Um, yeah. And I would love for you to join us in this journey of waiting because we're constantly going through different seasons of waiting. And eventually it won't be scary. It won't be intimidating.

Some people are waiting to have a child. Some people are waiting for marriage. Some people are waiting for a breakthrough. Whatever that looks like. Some people are waiting for healing. Right.

Yeah.

And the last chapter I talk about some people are waiting to meet their savior. And ultimately, and that's what I want to leave my reader with. Ultimately, we're all waiting for that beautiful, glorious day. So, when you are comparing the things that you're going through now with what you're waiting for to meet your savior, I want that to give you peace and hope. knowing that man, we can't compare the the the different challenges.

They don't compare to what God has in store for us.

Yes. Yes. Oh my goodness. So, I know in your book, well, before you even read what I asked you to read, I want to just say in it says here inside you will discover in this book how to see with eyes of faith, not fear.

Listen for God's voice amid the noise. Guard your heart and endure with courage. Reframe delay as preparation, not punishment.

And fix your eyes on heaven as your true destination. Waiting is not meaningless. It is the very ground where eternity takes root. I love that. So, I know like there's a benediction. Can you leave us with that, please?

Yes, I would love to. And I pray that these words will fill your heart with peace. The waiting season is hard. It's not always easy, but I promise you, the minute that you surrender, meaning that you just test God right at his words, he will allow you to experience this waiting season like a beautiful holy ground.

So, a benediction for the waiting. May you carry peace in the pause. May you hold joy in the delay. May you discover strength in the silence. May you embrace growth in the gap. And may you know deep in your soul that you are never alone in the waiting.

For the one who called you is faithful. The one who waits with you is the same one who will carry you home. Shalom.

Peace be with you. I love that. So, thank you so much y'all for pouring so much heart and truth into today's episode. And for my listeners, if you want to support this mission of keeping this podcast adfree and accessible, you can leave a review or check out the merchandise store.

Every bit of support helps me continue creating Christc centered mental health content for this community. And as always, please don't forget to trust in the Lord, guard your heart, and renew your mind. Bye.

Amen. Thank you.

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