Grief, Healing & Purpose with Sharon Honeycutt, CEO of Blooming Bean Coffee Roasters & Co-Host of This Beautiful Ugly Podcast

hello there fearfully and wonderfully made human it's me Diana from through the valley therapy and transform mind Consulting and coaching welcome to another episode of the holistic counselor podcast today's episode is extra special because I'm sitting down with not only an incredible woman but one of my dearest friends Sharon Honeycut Sharon and I go way back the mid 2000s when we first met through homeschooling our boys and a business Endeavor she had just launched life took

us on different Journeys but we reconnected years later while I was working in the film industry and she was building what what would become blooming bean coffee roasters what truly bonded us though was our shared love for Jesus and our deep passion for the creative Community since then we've both grown in ways we never expected we've become strong advocates for women walked through challenges that tested us and witnessed God's faithfulness in ways that still leave us

in awe back in early 2022 when Sharon started her podcast this beautiful ugly still here now what she ins inspired me so much she taught herself how to do it all driven by her faith and the pain of losing her husband and today we get to have a raw and real conversation about grief healing Faith mental health purpose and whatever else papad dios leads us into so who is Sharon she describes herself as an imperfect woman

mom Widow and now a newwood with seven adult kids her life like all of ours has been marked by Brokenness some self-inflicted some simply part of the human experience but through God's tangible love and healing she's has made it her mission to help other women find their way to wholeness Sharon is also the founder of blooming be Bean Co sorry blooming bean coffee roaster a business with a purpose their motto we roast for you with them

in mind that speaks to their commitment to supporting anti-sex trafficking organizations and partnering with nonprofits to educate train and serve atrisk youth but Sharon's story does not stop there after losing her husband to cancer she found herself in the depths of grief crying out I'm still here now what that moment led to something powerful the creation of this beautiful beautiful ugly through her podcast Sharon provides a space for Healing Connection and the Redemptive power of God's

love in the middle of life's hardest moments she shows us that even in the ugliest seasons of Life Beauty can still be found at the heart of Sharon's work is a message that so many of us need to hear no life story is beyond Redemption even if your pages are stained with hardship you are never void of healing because God's transformative love can restore you there is Beauty in and through the ugly woo so let's dive

in what's up girlfriend hey girl uh this is interesting this is the flip you've you've been on our podcast um a couple of times and it's it's cool to be on the other side of it now I yeah never thought right never thought I mean I remember that I think your podcast was the first time I've ever been on a podcast yeah and I loved it I loved it being a you know and I mean I

I was looking at what year your anniversary um is and I realized like oh my goodness you started February 23rd that's when your first drop was 2022 and mine was February 24th yeah 2024 and I'm like whoa that's weird and I just found that out how long how long we've been like really Soul Sisters I mean this is it you always learn 15 15 years I think yeah who would have thought right I know so and

then I'm so I'm I just want to say congratulations I mean a year and 44 drops yeah that's huge I'm I'm like so proud of you than from like all different angles and here we are talking about G on your side and your journey recently so um yeah so congrats and and God is using you big time so in in all levels of different cultures and and different worlds and and and faith and non-faith and you

know I'm just so excited to sit in with you for sure thank you no you know I learned so much from you when you first launched because I was there like watching you on the sidelines of you're like I don't know I'm just a little frustrated I'm I'm I'm in this class and and you just took so much pain and and instead of I mean you sat with it too like you you did the you did

the work you you were like what do I use what do I need and you went to a different people and you know like I have these questions right but I'm thinking like we could just go wherever we need to because this is how this works and that's what you taught me you Tau me because I came in I'm like I need to know ABC and D I'm not and I and I came with my P

like my PowerPoint but isn't that life isn't that what life is we try to have a road map and then life does things and so we have to be able to be flexible in these yeah yeah so why don't while you know we're here talking about this beautiful ugly and and I mentioned blooming Bean Coffee Roasters why don't you give us a little backstory of who you are and what lights you up these days okay so

uh who I am and what lights me up these days my backstory is as you heard I was married to R for 30 years have three sons uh left Corporate America to come home and home educate very similar to your story and that's how we actually met right and um and so during that time um you know we I've always had my hands and and in business and things like that doing something we we actually had

a marine industry company too for 30 some years and so as I'm home educa home education I put my hands in different things and always wanted to do coffee um but my life's journey through my own uh trauma that I went through I I found myself really helping women mentoring women that have experienced sexual abuse uh women at risk and young girls and that was my life's journey when I got you know I'm a a girl

of faith and so 1993 went lots of healing and that was where God had me always but then I knew I wanted to do coffee and didn't know how um but I I was like I have to do coffee with a purpose and a passion and that's when I started to get into the educating um at the sports games you know coaching parents how to be uh giving them pamphlets about how to you know uh watch

her sign for sexual tra sex trafficking um things that you know they parents get around these games like LAX forax lacrosse family and they were just allowing their kids all over the field there there's this freedom and this sense of safety and yet you know it it's opportunity too you know so um so I actually started there bringing coffee um to those those locations and selling coffee and using it to educate parents about anti-trafficking protection and

really prevention right and and from there um 2014 so 2010 I I was working with love song which was inside the nightclubs with girls providing a doorway for them to come out so we weren't yanking them out that but we were providing a door for them to come out a contact with us and with uh we were working with a a shelter called hepsa house so that really say that again I want to know more about

love song and I can never say that name so TSA house so um in the meantime I started working with love song which was a group of us women that had been we went to an anti-trafficking documentary um and we sat in there and the the director of the movie said it's nefarius was the name of it and he said so someone said what can we do to help other countries and he said I suggest you

start your start in your own backyard wow and so my four girlfriends and I left went to a coffee shop and that's where love song was born we where was our backyard and we identified the night strip clubs you know that had in our area our local Broward County area and God opened the door for us to go into those rooms and those spaces and build relationships with those girls and just love on them provide for

them and then um also provide a door of Escape if they wanted to contact us we would never you know again try to pull them out in that atmosphere for sa dangerous yeah that's real so we were in there loving on them and we also had the safe house set up which was uh heps of the house was the one that I partnered with and um supported and so so they were ready for that and when

blooming Bean came around uh so here's blooming Bean we're doing green markets we're educating we're doing sports events and um I got the opportunity to have a a collective space here in Oldtown in Broward County uh and I jumped at it because it was in the heart of drugs and crime and and and all that stuff that goes on and it was part of the revitalization so I went in there um God opened the door and

it gave me the ability to serve that community and um yeah so that's where blooming Bean was you know came out and so 2019 right before Co we closed those but we we Rose for uh local cafes and we roast retail and we still uh um we started I started the nonprofit but and Bloom as you know which is where uh you know the grief share came out of and daring um what I noticed when I

was working with other partners in Blooming Bean in our co-working space at the cafe there's a lot of great nonprofits yes a lot and I mean there was so many for the atrisk kids the one key thing that I saw was one they weren't communicating with each other they they had all these great services and the the youth had to go to so many different locations to get those services and their number one problem was Transportation

so it didn't make sense to me like okay you guys are not talking and we can't get them to you it's really difficult so um I started working with local campus pastors um in partnering with New Covenant Church that 27 acres and we provided you know with them partners of academic educ education completion a trauma counseling for the you know for the for the kids uh we did soft skills training and on the job training through

blooming bean I would have the the the kids work for me over the summers in the cafe and at New Covenant so for me we solved a problem we solved a problem of providing um tools for these kids and services to these kids during covid wow during 2020 where everything was shut down yeah and and it was such a beautiful a beautiful story to see what God did now your caveat into this beautiful ugly podcast caveat

um one key thing in bloomy in but and Bloom we decided to start a grief share group in 2020 six months before Rick passed wow I started facilitating a grief share support group to people that had experienced loss and I did not know how much of an impact those tools would have on me you know as a facilitator a co- facilitator actually so I want to know that because listen I I didn't even know did I

know that I don't think I knew that so you I thought you went into grief sh share after Rick passed but you were doing grief share before Rick p no yeah he was at home that's the way God works at time idea like what am I doing this for what am I wow yeah tell me a little more about grief sherff because that's really important yeah our board of directors um was is a counseling therapist Connie

Sanchez which we've had on our podcast and you know her really well and she said what we need here we need counseling and we need grief share we've got so many people experiencing loss and I think we what we can do right now since it's during this time we need to provide this group she was a seasoned grief share uh facilitator out of Connecticut and moved to South Florida and 10 20 20 years I mean amazing

and a grief therapist and a grief therapist a grief clinical therapist that that is her her Niche yes an addiction yeah uh so we said absolutely we we started it in August uh of 2020 had our first uh semester then and and uh Rick passed in December so can we walk through a grief share group because I'm Cur I have never gone I've heard about it I I know about it through you and the tools that

it provided I've researched it I've sent clients to it because I'm not a grief therapist so um because it is a it's a it's a I don't want to say a specialty but it is because you want someone that really understands the whole aspect of it all I mean I could do it but at the same time like there's people that have their Specialties and right not one of mine so right so the the beauty of

grief share it is video Le it is a faith this one is specifically a faith-based um support group and it's it's we are facilitators and um the the first of all grief shap for me is why go to a grief support group because they get you everybody gets each other yeah you know we've all experienced loss right and and some people you know may think that they don't want to talk about it but if any place

that someone understands and gets it is in a great support group um our friends as loving and caring as they are and they're there for us their lives are going to continue to go on and they're going to go back to a sense of normaly and they will begin to wean off and so we'll have a tendency to want to get angry at that but they're not our therapist they they they love us but we need

a a grief support group that will give us support Community because that was the only community that I was attending after Rick I wasn't going to church anymore gree share was my community and we needed the tools to be able to equip ourselves and if we had children or brothers and sisters we had tools that we could offer them too so for me G share was and I've done eight of them because I facilitated eight seasons

of them now when Rick passed I was a participant for for two and then um we we actually brought it on to another church campus and started one there in 2020 yeah okay so so when you say Seasons like you said you did it eight times can you tell the audience what that means well tell semesters each semester it's a 16 week and uh 16 I think so um so we would do it every uh three

times a year it would be offered in quarters does that make sense every four months for three times yeah okay so is it 16 weeks or 12 weeks it's uh what is that four time three is 12 yeah so it's four months which is 16 week that's right yeah yeah yeah and then we would dive into like a topic based things like how to survive the holidays and things like that and you really began to build

a real close Niche community and we always just say there's a lot of information that's coming across so it's like a fire hydrant effect when you're first going through the group you're like you're lucky that you're you showed up you're lucky that you know you have this safe place that you can go it's and then you start to get these little tidbits but the next time we always say go again because that fire hydrant you're going

to be able to dial in and there were so many times that I was like I never KN i' never heard that because it was just what I needed when I needed you know at the time and so I was able to pick up other tools along the way so um I'm grateful that I was I was facilitating because I was still getting a lot of of tools and and modalities and help yeah yeah so it's

it's video and a workbook it's video and a workbook and is cost uh there the cost is um it's $20 which is not bad it's for your workbook um and it depends on the community that you're with if it's subsidized and we always say if someone can't we someone's going to sponsor someone because we all we've all been there we get it we want we don't want anyone to feel like they're they're turned away so grief

share is a national support group and it's been around for goly day I want to say 40 years wow so yeah they're they're established and and on the videos they've got their there's licensed counselors okay that are are licensed in grief and also people that are facilitators sharing testimonies and people that have gone through it sharing their stories so it's broken down in modules that are I would say that are are you know um you can

if you missed one can come to you come to the next week and they're encapsulated so you don't feel like you're you're missing you know it's broken down by topics which is really great so say um I want to start tomorrow but it started uh last month I could still go absolutely because it g it grief shares a 247 swinging when we experience loss we never know when we're going to experience loss okay right so so

it's an emergency room for for loss well I want to encourage the listener to you know if they're kind of curious or they just start you know they're listening to this because they just found it and the word grief and they just lost the husband or or the the parent like I just did or whatever the situ a child because I just talked to someone yesterday that lost their daughter so it is you it's you're free

to jump in at any time I mean there is a website you can look at it but I I like to you know pick Sharon's brain because she experienced it and sometimes it's a little intimidating when you see and there here's the date you need an email and stuff but do it she's saying that it's so open that you can go at you know at that time even if they're on week eight or 10 right or

absolutely because your your loss is your it's it's immediate and there's support no matter what uh I will say when you go online and search your town you'll find the list and and and just go because you don't it's you can contact the person there and let them know but you may find that if it's okay to to visit a couple to find your home that's true you know there is you you you'll realize that now

of course you know here in Broward we have um the one that we facilitate through Coastal uh community and um and so there's there's so many wonderful people doing grief share so and did they have online too say like you live in a rural community and there is no like the the closest church is 25 miles away is there one groups online do you know or I guess they should check the website um I know that

there was during the pan you during 2020s uh pandemic season sure there were zoom and I think there may still be some Zoom opportunities okay um but but gri share will be better to do that um since um I stopped facilitating in in 2023 mid mid year so yeah all right so we're going to go from tragedy to purpose right losing your husband of 30 years was a life altering moment okay and I know I I

I've I know personally of quite a few um of those that people have lost their spouses you know after 20 years 30 years even you know within two years um and most people people do not know what to do with that amount of pain Sharon like that kind of pain so take I'm going to take I'm going to ask you to go back if you're comfortable with what in what was the initial season of grief like

for you and what at what point did you start just saying now what so my my first part was survival I was in fight mode um and I know there's the stages of grief but I like to say that stages of grief or all at once so true it can be and um so I was really in survival mode I had three sons two in college one home and we had two companies and so we had

the Marine company and industry company for 37 years and we had blooming bean and so I was really in that that uh that that survival and and actually I think that was pretty a lot to do with helping me because I was forced into a sense of normaly in my grief um probably try to pack that stuff away because I don't want to deal with it um but again I was already involved in a grief support

group because I was now the a participant you know I was not facilitating anymore so that really helped me break through those barriers um I'm looking at my notes here because I want to make sure that I don't miss something here now the now what yeah part yeah um know how do you know that's that's what I'm saying because how did I know what how did you know that yeah that you were there like it was

it was just oh I'll tell you how I knew so I kept my stuff together for three days my I didn't cry I I just I I think I was in shock yeah I was in shock that's that's the only thing I could think of and I had to like do things and um but I tried to make a delivery for coffee to a client and my mother was with me and she didn't understand why so

I was giving the Cofe God bless this woman and I lost it and right there it just floodgates came open thank God she was someone that could she she had a lot of empathy and um and and I was like okay I I'm GNA need to pull these tools out of the back of my head that grief share has given me yeah and and start to use these because it's gotten real right and that's when now

what now we go through all these legal things of closing accounts changing names it's such a you know if you certificates certificates you've got them before you you're submitting them constantly and then sometimes they're not getting them so I was at the bank like five times and that now what happened then because on the way home driving home I was just stabbing going I'm still here now what what am I gonna do you know I just

I was just so mad that I'm still here and I'm not out and now what you know got all of this and a lot of undone things because because Rick was sick you know and uh the way uh he passed and so there's a lot a lot left yeah and so I have found that the now what's comeing increments Diana from that time so that now what was just do that next thing yeah now what for

today now what for two days now what for a week now what put your feet on the ground get out of bed take a shower now what you know um and I think that yeah so now what became incremental in my life and note taking uh also became incremental became a very important part of that now white um yeah okay yeah I mean I've I I sort of experienced it with you like I think that's you

became super close honestly yes because I I was just watching how you you know I went to the service and it was one of the most beautiful and and remember I haven't seen you walk up and you're sobbing and I'm like stop sobbing yeah you were yelling at me because I'm feeling it all she still yells at me because I no she oh we're going to get we're going to get to that one thing where you're

like oh my God the next thing the tools that have let's talk about like you know there is no listen listener if you haven't experienced grief or you feel stuck in complicated grief like it's okay at the same time like she was talking about tools I think this is why like I'm processing quicker too because I have done grief with adolescence and other people and with Sharon and just I'm learning lessons and it is kind of

like taking a self-defense class right if if you have the tools you you practice these things you you keep practicing or knowing and understanding and so all of a sudden like oh this is what they were talking about okay it's time to take that Arrow or whatever it is to uh that tool um so there is no fep here's denial here's depression here's anger you know there is no you know here's finding meaning because I talk

about David kusters in my in my solo EP those the first book I ever read yeah was that when Rick past that was my go-to it's my go-to resource the way it's so beautifully done I'm glad you mentioned it that book was pital yeah in in January of 2021 yeah so let's talk about real tangible tools that help you put your foot in front of the other um I realized that grief is going to show up

and the most in inappropriate unexpected times and they're called ambushes and so I had to do something about it so there was there was a tool that I Ed where I began to invite I schedule my grief grief visits because I did not want that unwelcome I know they were going to show up it was that grief was going to show up but I didn't I wanted to be able to manage it so believe it or

not I scheduled grief cries wow good for you and I would wake up do uh windhoff breathing because that was part of my soul care which you introduced me to that and it was amazing it settled me reduced anxiety helped me to sleep yes whether you do it in the morning or night so then after I would do that I would say okay here we go grief you're welcome and I'm like you know I don't feel

like crying whatever and I would start to cry out of the blue so I began to schedule those cries and people are like are you crazy well it felt like it at first but let me tell you it managed the ambushes um because I didn't start I did mine in the morning you may have some somebody might be different they may have to pack that stuff up it's like you open your brain you shove that stuff

in there and then maybe um maybe a a scent or a song or something you're working you got to go to work you got your kids and and you're like you're getting these the other day yeah I want to talk about like the other day I opened up a San pelino because at the end of where my mom she just I just want bubbles I just want Bubbles and I opened that and Jim came home and

I'm on the floor yeah and that's why we're talk oh here it comes sorry guys but that's that's it yeah but you get it yeah yeah when a lawnmower doesn't start yeah and you're like you're why you're beating it and you're yelling and you're screaming and you're crying and it's you you begin you're experiencing those uh first times again this first time experience without him it there there's these you grief comes in waves and and there

you're going to exper people will experience first times doing things in life that maybe that's what Rick took care of he took care of the mower and then I'm doing the mowing by so here you are you got to s and sometimes we have to because we're in a situation we have to pack it up and then go home and give your soul that time to cry yes if it's a song that triggered go and put

that song on go to your room and cry after you put your kids down or you say I'm GNA take five and Bal my eyes out so I don't take it out on my kids yes you know I'm assuming I'm assuming through a spouse or partner whatever like that but um schedule those cries write things down because your brain is going to be foggy and you're going to delete you're not going to know people's names you're

not going to remember what you're supposed to do tomorrow so I had a notepad by my bed and I wrote a note down and I only wrote like one thing I had to definitely do the next day don't make it so complicated that was another key for me um I screaming into the Earth it sounds she Diana and I were together and um we were in a car and uh and we're going down the road and

this cyclist had a um had the legs of my husband and I used to ride bikes and he had his had Rick's legs calvs and I was like I looked and I got triggered I I should did a cry and Diana are screaming and next beside me and I looked at I'm like are you crazy like that but she said that will release the tension of that so I didn't own that for a while but however

let me tell you something I got into the woods and I started I found my space to be able to scream you know and it really and and I also actually I did a podcast on screaming into your pillow you know because it really helped you know screaming in the pillow you got to make it silent but um that helped me um can I add one more real quick of course uh no LIF lifelines people that

will be your lifelines people that have got your back no matter what so I had three lifelines um what I learned in grief share was that when you're going through grief you want to vacate yeah you don't want to wake up you just want to sleep you sleep a lot yeah he don't want to wake up and that's okay and that's totally normal that is just part of grief the the other that's not suicide by the

way suicide thoughts are when you start to make a plan okay and there's the change over so I've slept a lot I was vacating I wanted to close my eyes and dream of you know my life with my family I didn't want to wake up it's okay I woke up but one day I started thinking about that weapon that was in my drawer my lifelines I could call them at any time this was 11 o'clock at

night I called one girl I texted the other the one stayed on the phone with me the one came over to the house and they removed my firearm now I I had a firearm because Rick had a firearm so I just looked at her and I said I made a plan I started thinking about it and I said take it out of the house please yeah so can't stress enough to have people that got your back

as your Lifeline even if it's it's someone on the phone until somebody can get there yeah and if you and if you don't have a Lifeline that's what 988 is about okay please please please please please call please call please call because yeah your mind will play tricks on you yes it will it will no believing in Jesus or not okay we love Christ me and me and Sharon we love the Lord but when you are

feeling that much pain you want it to end that's why you you don't want to really end your life you want to P the Pain to End right understand though that the pain is temporary okay and but you also have to be responsible for yourself and pick up tools or like even when you don't feel like it get out of the bed yeah right and that's something that you helped me with Diana a lot about you

you you educated me on that cognitive distortion what goes on in the brain and and that I was short cirking because of of grief and it was going to take time so um how important it was to have those tools that Lifeline 988 Reef support groups um so so I guess what I may have wanted to know sooner than later yeah one thing that I could think of is that I thought I was gonna because I

was part of a greef support group and I did all these things and these modalities and self therapy and went to things it the magic one was going to and you're done and it was just going to go away yeah and that I wish I leaned into a lot more because uh I still experience it even now today and um and we and even as a newlywed you you mentioned that the very beginning so I still

experience it it's not the same grief but it still happens and um and it for me it's more towards my kids my adult three sons that lost their dad I grieve for them and I grieve watching their grieving still and because grief gets messy and I realize that people grieve differently especially men from women and I had to allow them to grieve their way and not get in their way and so everybody's journey is their Journey

um what I can do is just love them yeah and be present um but it still happens it still happens yeah I mean it's been how many years now like three and uh Five Years December wow I know and grief that's the thing like last night I was I was talking to in on another podcast I was the guest and we were talking about somebody that died when 40 years ago 40 years ago and it got

brought up and of course I began to tear up because I remember it like it was yesterday because that's what the brain does right it makes you think that you're back there but you're here and that's why it's important to uh pause to have that pause and respond in wisdom instead of react in Emotion so you know yeah that's a good that's a good thing to say because you you you the you said to pause and

and they they say when you get triggered and you're thrown back there um to do the five senses five what do I see I see my room what am I smelling I'm smelling my tea what do I feel my you know you know that the five senses what do I taste and it actually grounding grounding grounds you and brings you back if you can grab that tool I'll put everything that we talk about in the show

notes so it's 54321 that's what 54321 yeah it's the grounding and that I didn't even I forgot all about it until you said about pausing I'm like what did I do what did I do oh yeah I had look and see yeah so let's talk about the podcast a little bit about grief like this beautiful ugly isn't just about loss it's about the messiness of Life the beauty and Brokenness so why did you and let's give

a shout out to your co-host create this and what's Dr what's been one of the most unexpected powerful moments from the show oh gosh I think the most unexpected thing is that God would use such a broken person to start a podcast that would help people through their ugly season and and the and the re that that's one I've got a couple here because one is like how um I don't want to jump away from that

yet because the this beautiful ugly was named after um when I was washing sheets for Rick when he was in care here at the house and um and I would have to clean the sheets and so one day when I was in the laundry room and uh going still here now what you know and um and thinking about doing this podcast I was folding the sheets and I remembering that time it came back and I started

crying and I said for such a time as this in this beautiful ugly and it just flew out of my mouth and I'm like this this is it this is that beautiful ugly experience and that's the name of the podcast exploring that we're still here and now what um yeah a lot of God moments I think on that podcast um a lot of God moments in um God dropping nuggets through one thing thing that I I

did was like Dr Deb Harold is a naturopathic doctor and she's also experienced great grief I wanted credible uh doctors therapists I'm I'm a I'm a host I come with my bags but I wanted people that could bring their modalities and their expertise and it wasn't just me trying to do something so that's why you were on the show a lot and um but a lot of God moments that God dropped nuggets of healing for people

where we would just start speaking to you guys listeners and um uh providing you know just a prayer providing a healing story um and we would get such feedback about those things so yeah that was huge and crying when we interviewed Andrea that did uh did the children's grief book and she walked through this modality with us and show yeah that was power it was really real and and and I was like I've gotten so much

uh feedback from her book about children um a very simple way of talking with your kids through their grief because they go through it differ than we do yes what was the name of the book do you remember the name of book we will put it up I I'll send it to you it totally blanked out of my head but we'll definitely do that that that was good cuz I was your co-host that day so it

wasn't me being interview and it was you and and I was like blown away and that is that is a I actually use it I can't believe I can't remember the name d she has a couple of different books so yeah she's Dorne yes dor okay um you know like so the podcast is is it still running what is it what what's going on with it so I took a sabatical from the podcast in 2020 23

uh of the summer 2023 and uh laid it have laid it down for a year I are you gonna go into my new story now so I have to say why yeah okay so so I wore a lot of hats at a lot of times so I'm taking this I'm taking a breath yeah I'm taking breaths and one of these breaths was uh causing the podcast because I got married and uh I got married in September

of 2023 and celebrated a year it's been a year and couple months couple months yeah and I met my my husband Martin through Dr Deb and uh and that was Martin has had lost his wife and uh I had lost and Dr Deb knew both of us she's known his family for 30 years she's one of my closest friends for over 20 years and she was trying to connect us together for a while uh and I

was like no no no and so we did this we did this podcast together so the joke was she would get on and always ask me about it and about meeting him and then I told her let me pray about it and I'll get back to you and that was like I'm gonna pray about it right well here we are we're huh yeah he's a great guy I love him yeah and he's gone through his journey

too so his own different grief Journey like it's all different like it's two unique Journeys yeah 36 years married to his and 30 years two headstrong humans coming together with their own independence and stories because of what happened to them come get doesn't to sound like a new podcast doesn't it guys doesn't it okay no let me stop well and just so that you know as far as this beautiful ugly we decided for a year that

we would not make any decisions it's say this grief if if possible any major decisions yes don't make them your first year don't move you know people think well I'm they run away they go buy a new home their their grief isn't going to follow them it is guess what it shows up anyways every Monday for me because I ran every weekend but um so we made a decision and I I stopped doing the podcast and

focused on my comp focused on my my my marriage yeah you know new of course that's work I me yeah it's a lot of work we decided that that was what we're going to do we weren't going to make any Financial major move decisions and we you know and so here we are and um I've actually um moved my equipment to another location so that we can set up and start there it's would definitely look different

now we know that um and that's that's the part about still here now what right yeah and um and can you experience joy and grief at the same time wow because I and you can and you can you can hold and that's like I said grief comes in waves and phases and reminders come and uh it does change it does get better but the tools have got to be in place and the support I think so

that you don't get stuck and so um so here we are we have seven adult kids and we're we're not and they've all lost their parents and uh and and of course we're our Focus has been on our full fam with those guys and with our marriage and our journey um because it's still fresh you know it's still fresh we we we find that we can't bring our past Rel relationships this is new what what what's

happened is new our experience and we can't bring all that um tools and history into something new why why do we think that why do we think we can do that we can't so we are actually in family and marriage counseling wow um to navigate this new yeah it's coaching it's co to me because because the word counseling has such stigma like I'm going to a counselor therapy I don't need that and and and to have

the understanding of like wait a minute humans have other tools because they studied it so think of it as coaching like I'm getting good tools to learn to communicate this whole new Avenue of things while I'm still holding grief like that's you know I'm I'm glad to hear that I'm glad that you have the the the courage to tell the listener like no we're my husband and I went to family therapy not because of grief but

other things like you know I'm the second wife yeah you know it's like a our spouses are not our therapists exactly and often times you need a a third party a helicopter view to give you coaching because you're both experiencing grief no matter how you're dealing with it right he's a man I'm a woman and and so we and also how to help our kids yes our adult kids you know there's no age on Grief nope

not at all people think somehow we should have it together at a certain age no so um that has been very helpful for us uh to be able to have that coach with us see things that we can't see so I highly recommended our spouses aren't our therapists and neither are our kids and we're not our kids therapists either so no no no wow yeah yeah wow Sharon so the business part is what in this EXP

I mean Martin is now in is in working in the company with me um and blooming Bean is thriving and growing and um like you know God sustained me I took that that sustainment in that in that time that he was like I I want you just to sustain it but he grew it in the midst of doing that in this year and so we've been busy at that and so the the business has really brought

a lot healing to me because um as I'm continuing to do it because I'm continuing to now opening doors of opportunity again for my purpose and my passion which is working with women that have been abused that are you gone through trauma and um and and coaching and and and and walking that out with them and so I'm there's starting to be some Avenues opening up for that uh and also supporting some new nonprofits that we're

going to partner with so through blooming Bean uh as along with the ones that we are we have been supporting too so now my hands are I'm splitting time between Broward and um ala gville yeah I know so now that they're like weird snowbirds yeah yeah go north but not really yeah and and and so we're expanding up there even blooming Bean there is expanding so it's been great and and then there's a door that's really

opened up through the Community Church that we're involved in that work with at risk youth and women in Broward or El in uh in Gainesville okay in elel County wow wow yeah so God is tied is he's beginning to put my hands to things because good it was good to have the sustainability with with with doing a blooming Bean as a company but my heart is I got to be doing things with my purpose my passion

which is working with women so yes and you're good at it and I I'm always pushing I'm like when are you're writing your book when are you gonna do this when are you gonna do that I don't know I'm like no Journal joural well and she's artistic too no but you're you You' created like you see if you saw my journal it's like what does it say I'm all scribbl you see her journal it's like art

workful oh oh that's another therapy thing no matter if you think you're an artist or not drawing yeah thck people whatever you're feeling yeah I just would journal and start drawing the scenery that was around me it was amazing it was amazing so anyway I mean I could talk to you forever um but I usually try to end it less than an hour so is there anything you want to tell the audience Before We Say Goodbye

Oh My Gosh any any Bible verses words of encouragement whatever you that comes up I think the first thing is is to be really gentle with yourself yeah you know um you're going to have a lot of people that are going to try to tell you what to do and how to grieve and I should give you so many tools and like we probably have sorry but um if you take you know one one tip you

know away is that um you know taking care of yourself your soul care um is super important um and and yeah really being gentle with yourself and and knowing that that that grief is is a is is a journey like this and you can't you can't go over it you can't go around it you have to go through it and you may feel like that you're taking a steps back when and then you you're taking a

c but you're actually taking a couple steps forward so being gentle with your progress and um and and getting plugged into a community yes that that will help it's so key it's it was my lifeline for sure and just the the transforming love of God yes there I mean God doesn't pull us out of our grief so like mag magic one but he does sustain us through it if we let him and I know that it's

people want to be really angry and at at at God and and and but yet he's the one that will bring us through if you let him yeah he's a loving awesome father amen and uh yeah yeah yeah I mean he's seeing me through with studying the book of Psalms every morning 30 minutes just reading Psalms and and it's it's like the psalm shows up right when what I'm going through right I mean he talks about

grief he talks about Joy he talks about like that's all I have it talks about surrendering and you guys have to understand this is life that's the thing grief is part of life death is part of life like we're all born and we're all going to die and I know that sounds like super cruel because nobody wants to think about it but yeah that grief when you lose a loved one or it makes you think about

it yeah and so in your grief you have a story Sharon was brave enough to share her story and I appreciate that I appreciate your friendship your Sisterhood uh you coming on and being vulnerable and that's really important because the listener even if you haven't gone through grief you still have a story yeah share your story that's healing that's a good word Diana make sure you're sharing your story and and and I love when I hear

people's story because it I I get healing through people's stories and I get tools from their stories and I can relate to them and have I have a lot of empathy on this side yeah on this side I call it on this side because um so share your story and when when you talk it out loud even if you're looking at yourself in a mirror or in your pillow share your story because you will be the

person that can help somebody else through their Journey because you you will find yourself coming across a lot of people that are experiencing and you'll have a different perspective towards the The Human Side of people yeah yeah for real yeah wow thank you that's a great place to end well listener remember to trust in the Lord guard your heart and renew your mind bye and now for the disclaimer to make sure you understand that you are

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